The Scent of a Woman

Her lips fall from her cheek. Her lips leave delicate caresses moving slowly along her lovers neck. A familiar scent tempts her senses. As her nose grazes the softest parts of her neck and fills with the warmth of her skin and the scent of a woman. She stops to inhale all she can absorb. Her lover deep within her arms. She rests her chin and cheeks withing the comforting cradle between her shoulder and neck.

Laying there almost motionless she waits. Breathing gently, delicately along the depth of her lover’s neck. Just below and slightly behind her ear. Her lover quivers at the soft brushes of warm breath. She takes in slow deep breaths from her lover’s body. The scent is intoxicating. Her eyes close as she takes in the sweet, warm fragrance. A rush flows over her body as she takes breath after breath of her lover.  Together they flow within each other only aware of the other. Safe in loving embrace.

Sorry guys this is not for you. I realize men do love women as women do men. And that is all very beautiful too. But there is no comparison for what a woman can share with another woman. Our sense of smell and touch, power of emotion and depth of passion. It is beyond magical.

I sensed this from a very early age. I have never been promiscuous or even that adventurous in reality. Maybe it was fear, maybe it was circumstance, But I always noticed. I always felt it. I remember my first girlfriend well. She would leave her scent on my cloths, the notes she left me and in my mind. I could remember every detail of her and later girlfriends by remembering that fragrance. The way a woman’s skin  smells. Fresh from the shower, after a light workout, while she is making love. It is so very intoxication.

No perfumes or man-made scents can compare. There are many wonderful perfumes that enhance a woman’s unique scent. But too much and the effect is lost. I love, Adore and Desire women. I always have. I know more than ever that will never change. I am proud to be an out open lesbian.  My life has been blessed by some amazing women as frineds and lovers. Even now I cannot help but study a beautiful woman as she walks by. Not out of lust but out of sheer artistic appreciation. The female form is the most amazing thing to behold. There is beauty in all women.

The way she walks. The way she smiles, laughs, loves and cries. The way she brushes the hair from her face on a windy day. The way she turns and smiles at a passing friend. The way she lights up a room. The way she holds her infant child as she breast feeds. I admit to being an admirer of the superficial. But I love what is inside just as deep. I cannot help what I like. What I adore. None of us can. It is the way we are born. I was born to love and cherish women. And I respectfully do so with great pleasure every day.

Every once in a while that amazing scent is lifted in to the air. When you realize it on the street, in a shop or anywhere…. OMG the memories and the warmth… the desire.

I know many women are horrified at the thought of another women finding her attractive. But you should not be. I do not want to be with every woman I see or meet. Not all women are attractive in that way to me. And so it is for anyone. But there is still this undeniable beauty non-the-less. More often than not I simply enjoy the gift of admiring her beauty. I notice women. I love fashion. I can watch other women for hours on end simply enjoying how each moves or the simple silhouette in the sunlight. I capture women in my mind for inspiration. I only hope I can express my fondness for women in a meaningful and beautiful way in my art and writing.

To all women – thank you for being you. You are beautiful.

To Be. Or Not to Be… In Love

“When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace.” – H.H. The Dalai Lama

“Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring.” – Oscar Wilde

Love is a condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” – Robert Heinlein

What is it I miss most about being in love?
What is it I miss about loving another and having that love returned?
What is it that is missing from my life?

I consider myself a very fortunate woman. I have at various points in my life had everything I would ever need in this lifetime. I have had money, privilege, family, friends, happiness, health and so much more. Complaining about my life would be a lie for the most part. I have had a pretty good life despite a few tests of my soul and my character and my strength of will to live.

I have been talking with a friend lately. Someone I like. Someone with whom I have found similar thoughts and feelings as I. The intimate conversations mostly only women can have. Generally because women feel and experience life in a way that is deeper and more colorful of emotion. Tis a generalization that largely but not always holds true throughout the human condition.

We have been discussing the things we as single women miss about being in a relationship with someone we really care about. The simple things are never lost over time. They dance around us like moon fairies on the water at night. Seen, adored and always out of reach. The soft kisses early in the morning as you wake. The supportive embrace upon returning home from a bad day at work. Holding hands on the beach as the sun sets over the ocean. Reaching across the table at a cafe gently placing a hand on a cheek to feel the warmth of love radiating into your hand. Lasting gazes across the room at a party where the conversations turn to a melody of sounds without words. Spooning, cuddling and just being together.

I have had all these things in my life at one point. Now that they are gone I realize how important and wonderful they are. I am confident I will have them again. I am a woman of deep emotion, intense passion and devoted love. But all this means nothing with no one to share it with.

Some of us by nature are better when committed. We are complete and fulfilled by the presence of another in our lives. Loneliness is not a pleasant situation. It affords us too much time too think about what it is we are missing. I am also a Pisces which compounds the ache of an empty spot in my heart.

Not only do I miss the gift of love and a partner’s caring touch. I miss giving of myself. Feeling complete is not all about filling your vessel. It is as much about filling the vessel of another with your heart and soul. This world would benefit from more giving like this. I know because I have been there. The feeling of confidence, power and love that comes with giving unconditionally of yourself to another and not only seeing the light brighten in your partner but feeling the warmth of their inner light radiating back into your soul.

The secret to happiness is knowing what to feed your heart and how to nurture its growth. There are no things of man that can provide this most basic of needs. It is love. The only true fuel to ignite the fires within yourself and others is love. Without it loneliness serves only to cool and smother the fire within.

Talking about this with my friend has really opened many windows into my past. Not so much the woman I was once in love with but what we had for a time. When that dies something dies inside of us. But the memory of it does not fade like other memories do. I think this is because when something touches the deepest part of your being as love can do, it engraves a permanent mark on your being, your sense of self. Take it away and part of you is gone. The parts that remain are what your partner gave you that cannot be returned. Of all those things the feeling of life in a state of utter completeness and the memory of love.

In a way I am not a whole person. My other half is out there. When we do come together, magic will restore the imbalance in my heart. I used to believe in soul mates. Maybe I still do. I do still believe in love. I do believe there is more than one person in this world with a matching love of life and compatible soul where giving our selves too each other will ignite a blaze lying dormant within.

It seems we are rolling into a season where giving should hold more meaning and purpose. In these very difficult times we are now enduring, love is more important than ever. For some it is all they have left. For some it is all they would need to get them through another day. For some it is the breath of life.

I may find someone to share my life with again soon. I may not. The same is true for everyone. But one thing I do have is the ability love many people on many different levels. And I give it freely. That does not fulfill the same giving as giving to a partner. But it still feels good.

I wish you all love and happiness.